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Friday, December 30, 2016

Do You Have Good Etiquette and Poor Manners?

A wise person once said, "never confuse etiquette and manners. Bad etiquette is using your dinner fork on your salad. Bad manners is pointing out that someone used their dinner fork on their salad. Manners will always trump etiquette."


To be clear, etiquette is very important. It is the silent code of respect among others. When we have a basic knowledge of etiquette and practice it daily, it is a type of security. Everyone knows what to expect. There are no surprises or uncomfortable situations. Dinners and parties run smoothly and it makes everything more enjoyable.

Now, after we have all mastered etiquette, we still must understand and exercise manners. Accidents happen. Pointing out a situation and making someone uncomfortable is very poor manners. Ensuring that everyone is treated with respect should always be the first priority.

Unfortunantly, all of the etiquette in the world cannot substitute for poor manners. For that reason, here are major infractions that you should avoid at all costs.

Major Manners Faux Pas
-To snub someone
- To judge them for poor etiquette
- To correct someone publicly for a simple mistake
- To make nauseating or inappropriate dinner conversation
- To dominate a conversation making yourself the primary or only subject
- To do anything to attempt to make someone else feel inferior
Remember, we are all equal. And, there is always someone who is better at things than you are. 


Manners are rooted in empathy. If you are an empathetic person, most manners probably come very naturally to you. If not, no need to worry. There is an abundance of resource material online and at your local library and bookstore. When in doubt, ask yourself if most people would be offended by what you are about to say or do. If the answer is no, then continue. If the answer is yes, then you should probably pass.

So, as the new year approaches, make it a point to practice both good manners and etiquette. You will be treating others with the respect they deserve, as well as showing yourself the respect that you deserve. And, if you are surrounded by others that do not hold these values dear, it doesn't matter. Do them for you because you are worth it. And, you never know, you may inspire others in the process.

Are manners and etiquette important to you? Did you know the difference? Have you ever committed a manners or etiquette faux pas?

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1 comment:

  1. I wish you could send this article to all of the "Real Housewives" Great piece!!

    ReplyDelete